You owe me!

Dear Husband,


First, let me start off by saying that I appreciate all that you do for us, but you owe me big time for the shit I have dealt with this deployment. I am sure you won't read this until after you leave for your next deployment and by then it will be too late to give me the massage that I have earned these last few months, but I still think it is important to put it out there that YOU OWE ME! Normally, I think that our jobs are equally difficult but all that changed tonight. Let's back up a bit, last night it was brought to my attention that the water heater was leaking. At the time it was just a couple of drops. Yeah, those few drips have now turned into a stream of water. So all that nice clean laundry that I have avoided folding over the last 5 days is now in need of being washed again and it will probably be left sitting, clean but unfolded, for an extra week just because I will be too frustrated to look at it. This really is the straw that broke the camel's back. Let's recap this deployment and all the random crap that has happened:

• Several ER trips
• Crap inducing spiders
• Fleas
• The daily assault from Hurricane Teagan
• The water heater
• The dead rat with the waving eye 
• Waving eye's lunch in the engine 

All of that plus normal day to day crap (I mean that literally). I deserve a night in a hotel with no children and a bottle of wine, completely alone.  I will call you from the hotel to make sure that the children have not retaliated and left you hog tied in the corner.

Love,
Your loving wife

How long do you keep going?

Yesterday we learned that the DNA results for Josie are normal and no explanation for the EMG results. While we knew this was a possibility, it was still a hard blow. I thought we were within weeks of a final diagnosis. Now, we are back to more referrals, more appointments and more tests. I am to the point now where I don't know how much more I can do, how many more doctors we can meet and how many procedures I can put Josie through. A three year old shouldn't have a favorite hospital, but Josie does. She knows her way around the hospitals better than I do. Now we are left to decide how much longer to go down the path of tests and appointments. Do we see it out with the doctors we are seeing now and then stop? Do we see the new specialists? Do we see the specialists, but refuse any invasive tests? Do we set up a cot in the hospital parking lot and stay there until we get our answers? It is times like these that I wish I had a magic 8 ball or a book to tell me what to do. Apparently a book about what to do if your children are a medical anomaly has yet to be published. Which ever path we choose, I hope she understands when she is older that her dad and I did what we thought was best for her.